----Heavenly Father, in the Name of Jesus~

--"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him,
so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
---[Romans 15:13 /NIV)

---It was on of the hardest decisions of our thirty-three marriage. We'd both avoided it, especially Julee, but her suffering had grown unbearable, the disks in her spinal column being crushed by damage vertebrae. Finally, she was willing to take a chance on surgery.

She'd injured her back during years as a singer and actress. Once, performing a concert in Bucharest, she tripped over a cable as she was coming on stage and nearly had to cancel the performance. As it was, she could barely move during that show. In a crazy off-Broadway musical when we were first married, her role required her to be hoisted aloft to escape a dangerous accident. the hoist operator was new and wrenched Julee's back out of alignment.

She'd tried everything for relief: injections, pills, physical therapy, yoga, massage, meditation, rest -- lots and lots of rest. Finally reluctantly, she had agreed to surgery, even if it would have to wait a bit due to flare-up of her lupus.

"Edward, I'm scared."
" I know, baby, but the doctor says the risks are minimal. The worst-case scenario is to stay the same."
"That's what scares me. Staying the same. That's the same as losing hope, and I can't lose hope."

She was right. What outcome could be worse than the loss of hope? Of knowing nothing would change? I'm not sure I could face that risk. But Julee will . She told me, "There's only one way I can do this: with God. I don't ask Him to take away the fear, just to go through it with me."

I'll be there, too, Julee, asking God to be there for both of us. ~~

--"Father in heaven, in our deepest pain we turn to You for hope. Thank you that you are carrying us through these difficult times. in our Lord's Name."

--Guideposts/EG~
~~~~~