-HUMOR AND SHORT CLEAN JOKES~~

--'One thing I'll say for my wife, she's a very neat housekeeper. If I drop my socks on the floor, she picks them up. If I throw my clothes around, she hangs them up.
I got up at 3 o'clock the other morning, went into the kitchen to get a glass of orange juice. I came back and found the bed made.'
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-"I wonder if my husband will love me when my hair is gray?"

"Why not? He's loved you through three shades already."
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-The wife comes home and tells her husband, "I just got back from the beauty shop.'

Husband replies, 'What's the matter? Was it closed?'
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-A young man came home from the office and found his bride sobbing convulsively. "I feel terrible," she told him. "I was pressing your suit and I burned a big hole right in the seat of your trousers."

'Forget it," consoled her husband. "Remember that I've got an extra pair of pants for that suit."

"Yes, and it's lucky you have," said the woman, drying her eyes. "I used them to patch the hole."
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--Wife: 'You both arrived at that cab at the same time. Why did you let him have it? Why didn't you stand up for your rights?'

--Husband: 'He needed it more than I did. He was late to his karate class.'
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--Wife: 'Look at the old clothes I have to wear. If people came to visit, they would think I was the cook!'

--Husband: 'Well, they'd change their minds if they stayed for dinner!'
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--Wife: 'Darling, you know that cake you asked me to bake for you? Well, the dog ate it.'

-Husband: 'That's okay, dear. Don't cry. I'll buy you another dog!'
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-The latest thing in psychiatry is group therapy. Instead of couches, they use bunk beds.
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