Im thinking of just giving up

theres nothing i can do

i remember having mercury fillings since I was 4 years old

im now 19

I think my mother gave birth to me whilst mercury poisoned also

My obsessive compulsive and depression is too much some days , and my physical health is bad which makes me more depressed. Im terribly shy. Maybe I should turn to alcohol. I dont have enough courage to kill myself, I can drink all day and that will do it.

I can just give up life, become homeless and steal food all day, sitting in a park daydreaming and fantasizing about life, watching life go by