the insurance thing office is only open till 2.pm, and I couldnt get myself out of bed at all today and cant think at all and am totally out of reality. my left brain feels weaker and and deader than ever, i cant think. feel like going grazy.

yesterday I took 2 doses of ala 25mg (second one after 3 hours) to see it could have been mercury redistribution on thursday attack but didn see notice anything and woke up terrible today, like crazy, a vegetable , I didn't know if it was ala or just what happened to me on thursday progressing.

now I am even afraid to go to hospotal cause feel like psycho, and am afraid they won't take mi seriously or I might flip out and end up in an institution.

nobody's here to help me, I'm just rotting here, what did I do to deserve this.