pgm,Bex,Sunshine,
Thanks for all the messages.I just feel so lonely and desperate at the moment,I am sitting here crying,I am so moved by your message,I feel like you completely understand.
Bex
You gave up cigarettes,well done,this is not easy to do.
I used to smoke alot.I started at age 14 &quit age 21,such crucial years,it absolutely disgusts me now to think of this. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/oldsmoker.gif" alt="" />
I smoked my last one exactly 7 years ago,at that point I smoked 20+ a day.And giving up was 1 of the most difficult things I've ever done,I got very sick for months on end.
probably still suffering some effects,but I've heard it said it takes 7 years to repair all the body tissue,that might be for someone who has no additional body work to do...
What a lethal cocktail I gave my precious body during those important developmental years.I probably deserve every minute that I suffer.
Lately I just reached a point were I'm so overwhelmed,I know I mentioned this before.I really have been working overtime on my health 24/7 for the past 5 years or so.
I am so paranoid lately,Ifeel going crazy. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/unsure.gif" alt="" />
I am trying to arrange to get more hair tests done it's been a few years,I really want to see whats going on with metals,minerals,hormones too,A saliva test for the hormones.
Bex, as for taking care of my son,I've been so preoccupied with symptoms I have not been as great a mam as I would like,so far from it.I feel so impatient to be well enough to do stuff like take him to the park,arrange to have a friend over,I have not been able for this in months&months.He hardly ever complains &is so patient mostly,this upsets me even more.
He is older beyond his years,if you know what I mean.
Thank you all for the help,reassurance,advice,I appreciate this so much,you've no idea how much.
Andrew Cutlers' book is just amazing.The symptoms he describes are completely accurate.I wish I could get everyone I know or who cares for me to read this or at least take a look,so far no one will, To see all this in print may help them to take this more seriously.
I feel so paranoid like people just think,here she comes the one who had" the nervous breakdown" or whos "depressed"
"lazy".I am going to do a survey of the people I know and ask them what they actually think is wrong with me because I would say only about 2 of them know the others would say the problems i just mentioned.
so sorry for rambling again.am so lonely.
Thanks guys. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/hangingonanlimb.gif" alt="" />
