Dear Sosick its not my doubting of God so much, but my change of personality which worries me. I know its hard to believe but until I became ill i never judged anyone, whatever their religion race or mental state. Its weird because until a few days ago I truly believed my sister was with God so why have the doubts started creeping in again? I dont know. I had along with my sisters the most vilest of chilhoods imaginable. If evil does exist my mum is it. She put and still is putting us through the most severe mental cruelty. How any of us 4 girls managed to raise our children with love is beyond me. If I wrote a book about what we were put through everday of our lives I dont think people would believe it. I truly mean no one on this Earth any malice, just want to get well again and live a normal life. Not rich, wharever just normal . Do you know my sister died because of emotional asthma caused by my parents and they dont care. I say I feel no malice, but I suppose thats a lie yes I do towards them. Peace, I know you mean well, by the way artists arnt crazy just different, arnt we all. Tracy x