Hi anon, thank you. I am really touched! Had plenty of encouragement back myself <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />. I think it is the wisest thing, just to stick to threads that dont provoke or upset, especially when you're vulnerable.

It's easy to want to get involved sometimes when you see something you believe in being belittled, or you feel something that's been said might be inaccurate or unfairly stated, but if you find it screws you up too much to do it and you feel sick or your health suffers to get into debates like that, then it's time to back off and concentrate on healing (I have had to try and do this).

I think the kindness in conflict is something we all could do with reminding ourselves more perhaps. I'm not saying lets get really mushy and insincere about it, but I always admire people that even in debates and strong feelings can STILL be respectful and tactful to others, even if they feel like outright abusing them <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> That is hard to achieve and shows maturity, humility and the ability to put oneself in someone else's place. Hard to master, especially when one is toxic.