Well today’s been quite a contrast to the horrible hospital ‘experience’ the other night.
Although its really not funny I am strangely unable to stop laughing! Its like a mania or something. I think Bex mentioned something similar in another post about giggling fits due to mercury.
It is of course most likely a continuation of uncontrollable emotional outpouring which that farcical event initiated. It really has been a culmination of realizations, fear, stress and not knowing who/what I am - totally disconnected. I look as though I aged 10 years overnight, seriously.
But I am actually able to type this down, express myself, instead of just lurking on the forum unable to do so.

Anyway. I did deliberately time my ‘re-distribution’ day for this appointment after a chelation round so they would be witness to the rather more intense nightly seizures I get at those times. What a pity / irony / JOKE that in the very place one should feel they’d be properly examined, recorded, treated etc there wasn’t anyone to do it!

Now I have to somehow compose a letter to aforementioned **** ‘explaining’ myself, once more having to justify my existence / survival efforts.
It is deeply hurtful that my intelligence, my credibility and my word are all in question by these ppl.
Was I wrong to just leave the hospital un-announced? Probably. I know it was a fire safety [etc] issue but um… I just had a seizure and stuff so wasn’t exactly thinking clearly! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />
Having the cops coming after me was so surreal; having to deal with this on my own for 2 years its like I have got into a totally independent [but painfully isolated] mentality that doesn’t consider these social consequences.
U know, the most potent ‘highlight’ of how awful this life must be [is it? I really cant tell] was at Visiting Time that evening. I must have been so conspicuous in the otherwise busy ward by the fact I had no visitors.
Oh well, art therapy appt tomorrow, looking forward to that. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />