Wow, what a reaction

I never called any of you cowards, read it again and perhaps again until you get what I am trying to say. I am not calling you quitters or cowards, nor am i judging you for having suicidal thoughts billions of people have them evrey day. We all have. If you were leaving no one behind my post would have read alot different

When you post your GOODBYE message on a forum where everyon is rooting and praying for your recovery you can expect to get a reaction. Perhaps not the "shame, i dont know what to say, please come back, you will get well" kind of message but a message from a person who was orphaned by suicide and lives each and every single day with that pain and that torture. I would swop places wih you in a heartbeat to have my mother back and live it ten times over to speak to here one more time.

Dont read my previous post as a victim, all I ask is that you read it from your childrens perspective. Yes i was harsh and yes i hit a nerve but I wish, oh God i wish some one could have been kind enough to have told my mom what she was leaving behind.

Take the torture and torment you are going through, multiply it by infinity and take it to the depths of forever and you will still have barely a glimpse of what your children will live out. The questions, the feeling of complete abandonment, the emitional rollercoaster of hating and then pittying and then hating again. The constant question of why? what did i do wrong, maybe I could've stopped it, was it my fault.

It was not my intention to come across as judgemental and heartless and please forgive me for coming across as that just please dont hurt your children.