I felt like ending it all today, but the thought about those suffering, prevented me from doing it. When I sometimes reflect on my life, I wonder how I made it this far without pulling the trigger. I haven't cried in years, but if I will now, I will cry a river. Men actually commit suicide 4 times more than do women. On another note, I do not know what's it like to be dead. It could be worse than being alive. I wish that life had purpose, but it doesnt. I could create purpose by believing in God, or competing to win, or to leave a mark on this earth before I leave, or something of that sort. But the truth of the matter is, I or anyone else could be gone the next second while in the purpose process. Sorry to sound pessimistic, but today is one of those days. Hang in there Tracy, you are not alone in this indeed.