Ahh, what are you worried about? I haven't been in one for 12 YEARS. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />so add ten onto yours and then you'll really know you've got issues.

But yes, that is exactly how I feel. The moments of feeling good, you suddenly feel "up for it" and because they are only momentary, you cannot even trust yourself because then it's back to how it was again and sadly I wouldn't feel right with someone anyway. I'm too used to being this way and would be fearful to be with anybody. Also, I'd feel sick that they'd find out what I was really like.

so I compeltely know what you're feeling.

Yes to have the moments of feeling better, everything seems suddenly magical, but that's when I think 'will it last"? and I go to start thinking can I start living again? but as you said, it comes crashing down. So one doesn't really get the chance.

Yeah, the mercury symptoms are part of what i have, but I think there are other issues also. Candida, possible jawbone infections, gum disease. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> it just gets better all the time.

But seriously, I have GOT to get things sorted out. But it's very very difficult to find the right dentist, get the right materials pu in my teeth and find a dentist that does cavitation surgery (I haven't come across ONE that can do it all yet).

So I'm fed up. I haven't done juicing yet. I was doing better at one point, but have mucked myself up by cheating on my diet and smoking a packet of cigarettes, so my own fault.

I've been on antidepressants before, but all I got was weird side effects. I honestly think that many of us are so chemically mucked up, that we don't know whether we're coming or going. Anything can set me off, so I have to be vigilant on everything. I cannot even live a little and cheat or smoke sometimes, I just end up a vegetable.